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getabrain

fayanora in customerssuck

Things that annoy me

Things that annoy me about customers:

* Why is it I can explain something to someone in front of other people and the other people, who were plainly listening, ask me to explain again?

* Why is it that old people are always cold no matter how freaking BOILING HOT it is? Honestly, the other day it was like 80 degrees in the building because the air conditioner was not on, and this elderly woman had on two sweaters and a coat, but was STILL complaining of it being cold. It's only cold if you're old!

* Why is it that noone can seem to read the HUGE SIGN in ENORMOUS LETTERS that quite plainly says "PLEASE WAIT TO BE SEATED"? (I call people who do this either "sneak-bys" or "they're squidging up the line.")

* It really bugs me when I have to explain to the same exact person more than once that we don't have a buffet now due to the remodeling construction. It is NOT a difficult concept to grasp.

* The cash register is plainly visible at the bar, unless you're blind or mentally retarded you have no excuse for not being able to find it. Especially when I know for a fact that you have been here three times in the last week.

* Does the hostess station LOOK like it has a cash register at it, dumbass? No? Then why are you trying to pay up here?

* I realize that most buffets make you pay first. But we also have a menu. In fact, for the last few months we've had nothing BUT a menu while they are doing remodeling. We have had a menu, and had the "pay after you eat" thing for almost a year and a half. Plus, we no longer have the word "buffet" in our name. Spread the word. I'm tired of explaining this to people.

* I don't care what the woman at the Gift Shop told you. She's wrong. I would know, I work here and she doesn't - she works there. I could no more answer a question about the Gift Shop than she could answer a question about the cafe.

* When I ask you a question, know that you must respond. I am not a mind reader.

* Before making me get a lead to change a ticket from cash to points, it would be helpful if you would ask me to check your points first to see if you have enough. Because going back there once to change it is annoying enough... I don't have the patience to go back again.

* If I seat you somewhere and you don't want to be there once, that is fine by me. But it would help if you would tell me where you want to go, because every time I seat you somewhere and you change your mind is another inch closer to my going psychotic on your ass. Make up your fucking mind.

* Okay, look around you. There are about 58 tables here now, and all of them have people at them. There is no buffet, I have explained this to you. Thus, they are all getting menu items. The servers are all very busy. So learn a little fucking patience, please; there may be a wait. Scratch that... there WILL be a wait. So don't go dissing us for having poor service just because you've waited more than 10 minutes for your food. I have counted how long you've been sitting there, because my mind is always going in a million directions at once, and you have NOT been there an hour. Fifteen minutes at the most. It's not our fault you're an impatient asshole. And frankly, if you're not patient enough to wait more than 10 minutes for your food when we're quite obviously swamped, we don't want to ever see you again. Oh, and that comment that we're "not even busy"...??? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SMOKING? What universe is YOUR head stuck in, you fat cunt? Because I'm looking around and I'm seeing everyone running around like a chicken with its head cut off, trying to do everything at once and as fast as they can. Besides... from the look of you, bitch, you've already eaten enough food to last you into the year 3000. Your carcass could feed the entire island of Papua New Guinea, and they'd be stuffed like it was thanksgiving dinner. Your fat ass needs food about as much as I need my head set on fire.

* I really hate People who complain loudly and vehemently when I know for a fact that there was nothing with the food or service to complain about... and the only thing I can think of is that they must have lost a lot of money at the casino. For example, there was one guy who lost like $1000 at the casino and then got all pissy at hearing that we closed at 10 PM. He pissed and moaned so much that he got us to stay open for him till almost midnight. You know what, asshole? I don't care how much money you lost at the casino. It's not our fault you're an addict. Call 1-800-BETSOFF and get some help. But we're closed right now, so you can go fuck yourself.

* The odd thing about the place I work at is that people tip better when they have the buffet than when they order off the menu. I do not understand this... it should be the other way around. Especially since our menu items are so cheap.

* I hate people who ask for change so they can tip their waitress, and then when I give them their change, they walk out. Um, hello? Do you not remember what you just told me, like, 30 seconds ago?

* Okay, I have a question: you have to walk by the cash register to get out anyway, so why are you leaving your ticket and money on the table? Why not just set it up at the register? Even if you don't wait around for change, at least do us the courtesy to give it to the cashier, because leaving it at the table creates a lot of extra work for the servers who cannot afford to waste time taking your money up to the cashier because you were a stupid lazy cuntknocker.

* It really bugs me when I ask "smoking or non," they answer me, and when I seat them in non (which is what they said they wanted) they get out their cigarettes and try to light up. HELLO? You said you wanted non-smoking. "I said smoking." Then you must not have said it properly, because I heard "non."

Besides... I hate people who smoke in public to begin with. Smoking is a disgusting habit. I don't want to die for your pleasure, asswipe. And people who smoke around children ought to be either shot in the leg or arrested on child endangerment/abuse charges. Oh, and when you slap your cigarette box on your hand to get the cigs out, you look like a mentally retarded chimpanzee jerking off.

Comments

First of all i would lave to say PIC LOVE its so funneh :P

And URGH i hate people who give u that i've been waiting for evah speech when anyone with at least 2 brain cells could tell the time...

It's a resturant OF COURSE u have to wait for ur meal because then u know it will be FRESH!!!!

People are stoopid
Yes, humans have some kind of congenital birth defect that gives them all a poorly-functioning brain.
By the way, thanks for the compliment to my icon. :-D
* When I ask you a question, know that you must respond. I am not a mind reader.

AMEN! I get sooo sick of people who tell me "Soda" ..... and then nothing else.
Next time someone does that to you, you should say, "What kind of soda? Baking soda?"
...Sadly, my boss is a nazi when it comes to customer service. He's fired people for less than a comment like that.

So, until I put in my notice, I have to just say it in my head. :(
Ah, okay.
I like:

"I need a lamp."

.....

*** I look around*****

.....

"You want ALL of them?"

Be specific, Fuckbags! I'm not climbing a ladder until I know what to reach for!
OHH...I always get the "I want a sandwich."

We only have like 10 different sandwiches on our menu.

Morons.
I can see it now:

"How may I help you?"

"I want a sandwich."

*Crickets chirp*

"What kind of sandwich?"

"A hot one."

"What kind of hot sandwich?"

"God, what's with the 20 questions?"

"Well, sir, we have a variety of hot sandwiches to choose from, which are plainly listed on the menu."

"Fine, fine. Jeez. A hamburger."

"What would you like on your hamburger?"

"Oh for Christ's sake! A fucking hamburger!"

*Dirty look*

"Okay... one hamburger, no bun, no nothing."

"No, no! A cheeseburger! With pickles and stuff. Hold the onions."

"Thank you, sir. Anything else?"

"*Sigh* Get me a cold beer."

"What kind of beer."

*Headdesk* "A COLD one!"

*headdesk* "What kind of cold beer?"

"*sigh* A Bud Lite. And no, nothing else."

"Thank you sir, I'll be right back with your order."

(Goes away)

"Sheesh, some people."

(Meanwhile, at server station) "Sheesh, some people!"
Oh, and when you slap your cigarette box on your hand to get the cigs out, you look like a mentally retarded chimpanzee jerking off.

This seriously made me break out laughing LOUDLY in my very small apartment at 5:30 in the morning. If my step mother kills me I am holding you responsible!

As for the tip thing, they probably tip more for the more expensive food so if the menu item is cheaper that is probably what is going on.
This seriously made me break out laughing LOUDLY in my very small apartment at 5:30 in the morning. If my step mother kills me I am holding you responsible!

If you did, it would be the first lawsuit filed by a ghost. :-)

Well... the buffet IS $6.50.

But think about it: people should tip more for menu items regardless of the cost, because of all the work the servers do for it. With the buffet you just get your food and stuff your face, and all the server has to get you (unless you ask for other stuff) is drinks.
"Your fat ass needs food about as much as I need my head set on fire."

that is the most eloquent way of putting it! i am laughing my rear end off! :)
Thanks. :-)

I don't normally make fun of overweight people, being one myself, but this woman was very nasty and was big enough where she could have eaten me for breakfast and still been hungry. You know those people who look normal from the waist up, and from the waist down they just... explode? She was one of them.

I don't know how I managed to not say anything nasty to her.

What was most annoying was, she and her group came back for lunch after having walked out impatiently at breakfast because they'd waited more than 10 minutes without being served before giving up, and then having the gall to say they had waited an hour to be served! Dumbasses.
and they came back for lunch.... hoo-boy... some people should really just die of stupid. it should just collapse their skulls. they are obese people eating out for BREAKFAST AND LUNCH (probably dinner too at this rate, why not?) and they are mean to the waitstaff and come back like 2 hours later and act like nothing happened...?
Well they walked out before they could even order breakfast. But essentially, yeah.
presumably they got breakfast somewhere else. i mean, i don't usually go out for breakfast and then just go home, but i don't eat out very often either...
For all I know, they might have gone to go gamble and eaten one of their children while they were there, but it was one of the scrawny ones (only 200 pounds) and they got hungry again.

*Hangs head in shame* That was a mean joke. LOL! But funny as f**k.
:)
We have TWO huge signs that say "ORDER AT REGISTER" at my restaurant. And it's like it's written in Chinese or something. Because people will just sit their lazy asses down and stare at me. And I just pray that they will keep staring and starve to death.
LOL!

Honestly, lab mice are smarter than most humans.

PS

September 2019

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